Sad departures

On the morning of Sunday, October 12th, we had to say goodbye to the beloved kitty matriarch of our family, Dee Dee, and help her "graduate" from this life to the next. She had battled valiantly with thyroid disease and advanced arthritis for years. But it was a nasty virus that had afflicted all the cats in the house that attacked her compromised body and brought us to the hard decision was had to make. Although she was under the watchful care of the vet as soon as she showed signs of being sick, in less than a week Dee Dee turned from being our smart and affectionate little ginger into a shell of her former self. She couldn't fight anymore. It was time to say goodbye. Her best friend, Thomasina, and her twin brother, Dexter, got an opportunity to say goodbye before Hubby took Dee Dee to the emergency vet while I stayed home with the other sick kitties.

We thought that trip to the vet would be the only one that day, and we went about the business of trying to get the other kitties well.

But, only 13 hours after we said goodbye to Dee Dee...

... we had to say goodbye to her noble twin brother, Dexter, and help him "graduate" from this life to the next too.

Dexter was the first to get the same nasty virus that Dee Dee got. He had shown symptoms of some strange illness on the evening of Sunday, October 5th, and Hubby had him in to the vet first thing Monday morning. Dexter spent that day at the vet in in-patient care, and went in again on Wednesday for a full day of in-patient care (Dee Dee got the same all-day in-patient care too on Tuesday and Friday). We were told they had the equivalent of the "kitty flu", and because they were both having cortisone injections for arthritis, their immune systems were compromised so the virus was hitting them harder than it was our younger cats that don't get injections. We were told that the most important thing was to keep everyone hydrated until the symptoms went away. By Friday evening, we were hydrating Dee Dee with water-filled or pedialyte-filled syringes. Dexter was getting water and pedialyte from a bowl because he could lap water unassisted.

By Saturday, Dexter had moved through the virus and was beginning to get well from the symptoms. He was eating tuna heartily and drinking water. But he appeared wobbly on his feet. We assumed it was just from being weak from the virus.

But by Sunday evening, Dexter was staggering around so badly he couldn't walk to get water or food. Hubby rushed him to the emergency vet while I stayed home with the other sick kitties. Tests at the emergency vet revealed that Dexter's kidneys were failing. The virus had pushed Dexter's kidneys to their limit. His is sodium levels to toxic quantities causing his neurological system to shut down.  We didn't know his kidneys were compromised. He had lost a significant amount of weight in the last two months, but we hadn't discovered what was causing the weight loss before he got sick. Like Dee Dee, Dexter had turned into a shell of his former self in only a week. I could barely recognize my sweet, benevolent prince of a cat. It was time to help him "graduate" with the dignity he deserved.

In Memory of "The Originals"

Dexter was my loyal, noble and ever-present companion for 14 wonderful years. He supervised everything I did from laundry to vacuuming to home improvement projects (he wasn't afraid of power tools). He was gentle and kind with new visitors, children, infants and even my mom's little chihuahua that was smaller than he was. He sweetly accepted the other kitties that we took into our home and put up with all of their nonsense with grace (even when they were mean to him). I always would whisper into his ear, "Dexter, I loved you first... and I love you best" and he would purr.

Dee Dee was the quintessential queen of our little cat colony. She ruled with grace, love and matriarchal dignity. She adored Hubby with a passion and wanted nothing more than to be picked up and carried around on his arm while she licked him after running to greet him at the door when he came home from work or when he first awoke and arose from the bed in the morning. She particularly enjoyed playing hostess to visitors and would greet everyone that came through the front door with curiosity and kind affection. Her fascination and adoration of children and babies was so precious to watch. An extremely intelligent ginger tabby, Dee Dee always had a lot to say about everything and would negotiate with me constantly to get her way (just like a 2 year old toddler).

We were privileged to meet them when Dexter and Dee Dee were only 10 days old. We've known them ever since.

The two kitties were miracles to us. Before getting them 14 years ago, Hubby was highly allergic to cats and couldn't be in the same room with a cat without getting asthmatic. But with faith and prayer, that changed (now he's allergic to dogs... go figure). They came into our lives when we were rebuilding our home... and I was rebuilding myself. Two little furry kitties did so much in healing us both. We've never known life living here at Rosehaven Cottage without them. Our home feels hollow and empty without them here.

Interestingly, Dexter and Dee Dee have never had to know any existence without each other... even now.

We know without a shadow of a doubt that Dexter and Dee Dee are now running and playing like they did when they were young (before the arthritis). They were greeted on the other side by our beloved kitties that had passed on before them—Lydia (2002-2012), Tom Tom (who left us a few months ago in May), Suzette (who left us at the end of this summer) and the garden kitty, Oreo (who left us in September). We are certain all of them are having wonderful times together frolicking about, watching "kitty-vision" and exploring lush patches of grass to nibble on.

I miss Dexter and Dee Dee terribly. My chest aches every day with an ache that is so profound I can't describe it. I weep every day wishing I could see their beautiful furry little faces. But I know I will see them both again someday... and we will all play together like we always did.

Dexter and Dee Dee, you are mine forever and ever.

Instead of "breading" the cat, we prefer "Abe-ing" the cat. It's far more dignified.

Don't know what "breading" the cat is?

Click here to find out

DISCLAIMER: We think breading isn't a very nice thing to do to a cat. However, "Abe-ing" Dee Dee for this photo was something she thoroughly enjoyed. She sat and watched me make the hat while Hubby narrated to her what I was doing. She was quite excited to get all the attention. I cut out spaces in the brim of the hat for her ears, so she was unfazed once we set the hat on her head for a quick photo shoot with the iPhone. She's such a diva that she loved being cooed over.

Nothing worse than being scolded by a crabby ginger tabby

When does Dee Dee resort to her crabby scratchy meow?
Let's see...
When she wants a drink of water
When she wants her pre-bedtime snack
When she wants a drink of water
When we've been gone all day
When she wants a drink of water
When she's locked out of the bathroom
When she wants a drink of water

Chap 8: Motivation is Delivered in Furry Little Packages

Click on any image to view larger and read captions easier

It’s funny how unexpected events in life often come along that add motivation and encouragement when we need it most. We discovered this phenomenon firsthand in mid-September 2000.

We had been at work on the house for a month and half. My brother’s time helping us was drawing to a close, as he had university classes to go back to in mid-September. He left us with so much accomplished on the seemingly never-ending task list we had before us. Josh and my mom had tackled the major task of tiling the downstairs bathroom. As a team, they cut and set white tile after white tile with beautiful, narrow, and clean grout lines in between.





Josh and Mom were also able to grout most of the tile, leaving only the tile around the bottom edge of the tub for us to do.


And it was left to us to lay the large ceramic bathroom floor tiles.

Working on the bathroom and kitchen simultaneously while trying to maneuver around the stacks of moving boxes staged in the living room and bedrooms wore on our nerves and frazzled our sense of accomplishment. It seemed like we had been at this forever and would continue to be at it in perpetuity. It was hard to imagine a time when we could move out of the spare room at my sister’s house and really live in our own house. We had determined that as long as we had an operational shower downstairs and the toilet upstairs, we could move in. We didn’t need a kitchen sink. We didn’t need a downstairs bathroom sink. And we didn’t need a downstairs toilet. That shower was all we needed. But the daunting task of getting it completed with the last tile and grout around the edge of the tub was so overwhelming that we avoided it. And our move-in date continued to be pushed out indefinitely.



That’s when the unexpected life event came along to nudge us.

In mid-September, we drove a half an hour east of our new home to attend a family gathering of Hubby’s relations as everyone came together to attend the baptisms of two cousins. We all converged at the ranch of the in-laws of my in-laws (Hubby says that makes them “outlaws”). I love visiting ranches, farms, or anywhere else that has animals. I tend to have social anxiety at parties and gatherings, so if there’s an animal around for me to focus on, I’m a happy camper.

To my sheer delight, there was a litter of 10-day-old kittens on the back porch of the ranch house. All the young cousins gravitated toward the kittens, whose eyes were just beginning to open. Here were all these kids and me, cooing over the precious little balls of fur.

The mama cat, Skittles, was a blotchy tabby that had spots of red tabby and spots of regular tabby. The sire of the 4 kittens was a handsome red striped tabby that lived at the ranch next door. Both parents were large cats with frames the size of small jungle cats. And Skittles was a hefty mama weighing in at close to 20 pounds. A couple of “kittens” from previous litters were still at the ranch, and it was evident that “big” was part of their genetics.

The newest kittens were all red tabbies except one—a little black striped tabby with white paws, a white bib, and a red tabby undercoat that made him look like a tiny tiger with his black stripes and ticking. I held him and snuggled him. He was precious. The kids at the ranch had handled the kittens since day one, and it was obvious that this little guy had been socialized well in his first 10 days.

I was in love!

I called Hubby over to see this sweet little kitty that had already stolen my heart. Despite being allergic to cats, Hubby was smitten too. He didn’t have any allergic reaction to this little guy and before I knew it, we were making arrangements with the in-laws and reserving this little one as ours. We agreed that we would take him when he old enough to leave his mama at about 9-10 weeks old. And we agreed that we would be coming out every weekend to visit with our little one until we could bring him home.

I decided to name our little kitty boy after one of my favorite movie characters, C.K. Dexterhaven, from The Philadelphia Story played by Cary Grant. We’d call him Dexter for short.


This turn of events gave us the new impetus to get it in gear and get the shower done so we could move in and bring our little Dexter home. It gave us the hard deadline we had lacked up until that point.

Over the next month, we made our weekly visits to the ranch to see our growing kitten and visit with his littermates. The kittens were probably only about 4 weeks old when we went out to visit them and another turn of events happened.

As we sat on the back porch entertaining the kittens with dry leaves, one of the little red tabby kittens began to pay a great deal of attention to me. She came up to me where I was sitting on the porch step, and sat down right between my feet. Then, trying to be like a big kitty, she leaned into my ankle in a wobbly kitten-like way, looked up at me, and asked for affection. I brought her to Hubby’s attention. This little gal was very focused on us, as was her brother, Dexter. The other two kittens were more interested in playing with each other and roughhousing. I knew from past experience, that if you’re picking out a kitten from a litter you should always pick the kitten that is focused on you and not necessarily the kitten that has the color fur you’re looking for.

During that visit, Hubby and I realized that we were going to become the proud owners of two kittens and not just one.

We had to come up with a name for the little strawberry blonde sister we were claiming. We were fans of the Cartoon Network’s cartoon, "Dexter’s Laboratory". In the cartoon, a little boy named Dexter is a “mad scientist” of sorts and he always introduced his blonde tutu-wearing sister as his “stupid sister Dee Dee”.

It seemed fitting to name our Dexter's sister Dee Dee--even though she was far from "stupid" as she had artfully charmed her way into our hearts and into our home.


We had even more motivation to get the shower done and get moved into our house. We worked hard getting a downstairs room in shape to be our bedroom and getting the shower tile finalized and the floor tile laid so we could finally occupy our own home.





The month of October was spent finalizing all the things that were on the “must have” list so we could move in and then bring our kittens home.

I remember vividly the evening of Halloween, when the “cable lady” came and hooked up us up so we could have television reception. We accepted trick-or-treaters for the first time that night while I arranged furniture in the living room and moved boxes around so we’d have one room where we could relax and feel like we were "home".

Over the following week, the final touches were put on the tub and shower. When the fixtures were finally installed in the tub and shower, we could finally move in, and on November 8, 2000 we officially started living in our house when we spent the night in our own bed.



The next day, on November 9, 2000 we drove out to the ranch and brought Dexter and Dee Dee home. They made themselves right at home.



Dexter eventually claimed me as his human. And Dee Dee claimed Hubby as her human with her beguiling little feline feminine wiles. Their presence amidst the continuing work has been the bright spot we have focused on through some difficult tasks and trials. Their love and devotion has dried up many a tear and their antics have brought a smile to our face many times when nothing else could.

Since he was a wee thing, Dexter has monitored and supervised all the work that goes on around the house (including countless loads of laundry in our front loading washer). He will brave just about any power tool in order to remain in the room and supervise the changes we're making.


When Hubby comes home from work, they both run to meet him at the door. And when visitors come to Rosehaven Cottage, they are the self-appointed host and hostess. They fulfil their duties well by greeting the guests as soon as they arrive and giving up their nap time to interact and socialize with everyone until the visit is over.

Dexter and Dee Dee were definitely meant to live here at Rosehaven Cottage as much as we were.

My "Personal Assistant" and the other members of our cat colony...

Last night, our local PBS station aired a show about dogs and cats and why we humans love them. The show featured a humane society facility that has a screening process they perform on both the animal up for adoption as well as the potential adoptive families. For cats, the evaluation helped to classify their personalities into three color categories with three personality types in each color category (a system I was pleased to find is in action at our local rescue shelter, ARF). Being the stewards over our own indoor cat colony of eight, it was highly informative and very amusing for Hubby and I to place each of our own kitties into the category they belonged.

Interestingly enough, two days earlier on Friday I had taken a break from work in my home office to take photos of each of the furry friends I had "assisting" me in my studio at that time. I thought it would be a great snapshot of a typical day running a company from my home office/studio. Now that I've been enlightened about cat personality profiles, I thought it would be fun to match up those photographs with their corresponding personality.

Dee Dee is a "Personal Assistant"...

"Personal Assistant: You’re working on the computer? Let me press the keys. Reading the paper? I’ll hold the pages down for you. Watching TV? I’ll just plop in your lap so you can pet me. I love an orderly household, don’t you? I’ll help you with all your chores, and I’ll help you relax when we’re done. You’ll wonder how you ever managed without me."

Dexter is the "Leader of the Band"...

"Leader of the Band: I’m a cat who does everything in a big way. I not only like to be in the middle of things - I like to lead the parade. I’m an adventurous cat, but I’ll still make plenty of time to show you my affectionate side. I’m the demonstrative type, you might say. Want a cat who’s brimming with confidence? That’s me."

Tom Tom is an "MVP"...

"MVP: I’m a savvy cat who knows the score. I’m pretty unflappable, too. I don’t mind entertaining myself, but a human companion at the other end of the couch and a nice scratch behind the ears always make my day. If you’re looking for a resourceful addition to your team, think about signing this Most Valuable Pussycat."

Thomasina is a "Love Bug"...

"Love Bug: Do you seek affection? I do! If you also like petting, purrs, and paws kneading your lap, I think we might have A LOT in common. I’m looking for 'someone who enjoys quiet times and togetherness.' "

Lucy is a "Party Animal"...

"Party Animal: I’m a cat on a mission: PARTY! I love to play and explore and test my limits. I’d love to play with you, but I can make a toy out of anything: pencils, post-it notes, potatoes. If you’re looking for some laughs and someone to liven up the party, think about inviting me."

That's it for the kitties that were "assisting" me in the office/studio last Friday (they're almost always the ones in there too). Now for the others that were elsewhere at that time...

Gus Gus is a "Private Investigator"...

"Private Investigator: I’m working undercover to keep an eye on you and your household. You may not even know you’re under surveillance. I can vanish into thin air if anyone or anything interferes with my investigation. If you need a cat who knows how to stay out of trouble and will always keep your secrets, I just might take your case. "

Suzette is "The Executive"...

"The Executive: I have to say, I’m a busy cat. First, I’ve got to check out what’s happening out the window. Next, I’ll see if any closets or cupboards need looking into. And then there are my naps –can’t be late for those. I can fit a little socializing into my schedule. Shall we plan on breakfast and dinner? I hope you like kibbles."

Lydia is a "Secret Admirer"....

"Secret Admirer: When it comes to relationships, I’m very level-headed. I don’t leap in paws first, if you know what I mean. But give me a little time, and then I’ll shower you with purrs, head-butts, and plenty of lap time. In the meantime, you may not see a lot of me – but I’ll be thinking a lot of you."

A Christmas Surprise

I was out running some errands on the 23rd, when I got a call on my cell from Hubby. He was working from home and wanted to tell me that I had received a package from the U.K. "What is it?" he queried. I told him I didn't know. Once I got home and saw the package I knew who it was from. My dear blogging friend Melanie from Jellybean Angel had sent me a Christmas surprise. Since it wasn't long until Christmas, I decided to wait until Christmas Day (today) to open my package. Hubby was right there with as much curiosity as I had. This is the wonderful array of goodies I found when I opened all the individually wrapped gifts...

The gorgeous rose print in the background is an adorable Cath Kidston print totebag made for Marie Curie Cancer Care. Then there were the makings of some "pamper time" with pink bathing roses, a tealight, some mint hot chocolate mix and a box of after dinner mint chocolate leaves. And the pink bathing roses are in my favorite rose scent--the smell of my Grammy's dressing table when I was a little girl.

How does Melanie know me SO well even though we've never met in person? Blogging, I guess. Somehow through the exchange of tidbits of life, we have to opportunity to get to know others in a way that is special.

What Melanie didn't know is that I've been having issues with my sciatic nerve on the right side of my body. This "pamper time" surprise is a reminder to me to take some time out and soak in a nice hot bath and let my body relax and heal. Thank you, Melanie!!!!!

As an addendum to this post (the rest of the story)...

In the midst of opening my goodie box, the kitties had to see what the crinkling and crunching of paper was all about. Of course, Dee Dee (the matriarch kitty of the house) had to be right up in everything. When it came time to photograph the goodies, she kept wanting to get in the middle of everything to touch it, sniff it, and generally be in the way (as Dee Dee does). Hubby was armed with canned air and spritzed her numerous times as he told her she wasn't allowed up on my worktable where I was shooting. This turned into a war of the wills, as Dee Dee insisted that she HAD to be in the middle of everything. She protested vocally repeatedly in her meow that is reserved for temper tantrums. I finally got the shots, and then Dee Dee was allowed to come up and sniff again. She promptly layed down on top of all the spent wrapping paper and gave Hubby "the look". And here it is...

And then Dee Dee gave me another of her "looks" for good measure...

Goodness!

Twas two weeks before Christmas and all through the house...

Not a creature was stirring, not even a... Dee Dee.

You would never guess from the photo above of our little Dee Dee angel that she is almost solely responsible for our decision to not put up a Christmas tree each year.

We call her the "little orange terror", not because she rips around the house terrorizing everyone, but because she is methodical and relentless in the way she "terrorizes" us humans that share her domain. If a kitty could win an award for perseverance, she would get it. It doesn't matter how many times she's been told "no", removed from the scene of an offense, or even squirted with a spray water bottle. After a 30-60 second break, Dee Dee will just return to whatever repetitive naughtiness she was instigating prior to being reprimanded.

Needless to say, after repeatedly finding her midway up the Christmas tree in years past doing her best imitation of a "partridge in a pear tree" and subsequently bending the artificial tree limbs to the point of no return, we decided that it just wasn't worth the hassle.

So Rosehaven Cottage goes without a yearly Christmas tree in the true sense although we do have two mini Christmas trees that flank our fireplace mantle where Dee Dee cannot reach them.

Wrapped Christmas presents in years past also met their fate under the paws and teeth of Dee Dee who is obsessed with paper products of any kind. She loves the sound of crinkling paper and comes running whenever she hears the smooth "swoosh" sound of my paper-cutter when I'm doing some paper craft or the distant "crunch" of a paper pattern when I'm cutting out a sewing project. Therefore, wrapping paper and tissue paper aren't safe for long. In the past, most gift bows spent more time off the gifts than on. Sigh...

Fortunately, I am a photographer. So instead of decorating our home with decorations, brightly wrapped presents, and Christmas trees that would all be too much for Dee Dee to resist, I capture images of other people's beautiful decorations and displays and then look at those throughout the Christmas season. It gets me the Christmas spirit to go "window shopping" without the "Grinch-iness" of having to repeatedly scold an naughty OCD kitty cat.

Without further adieu, let me share some of my favorite images from this Christmas season thus far.

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Dee Dee the Photogenic Kitty

Dee Dee is Dexter's sister (yes, she is named Dee Dee because of the cartoon "Dexter's Laboratory"). She is also Daddy's girl. I can't believe the connection that those two have. It is adorable to watch her run to the door to greet him when he comes home from work. It is also particularly sweet to watch her ride around on his arm like a little chihuahua dog licking his arm.

Dee Dee is particularly perplexed today because Daddy was gone all day yesterday, all night, and all day today. She's not quite sure what to think of the situation. Normally very talkative and interactive with Daddy, she has been fairly subdued today but has shadowed me around the house. Daddy is coming home any minute now, and Dee Dee will be thrilled to hear him walk through the front door. He'll probably get a talking to from her as well as if to say, "Daddy, where have you been?"

You'll notice that Dee Dee's hair sticks up on the back of her head. We call this phenomenon "Woody Woodpecker hair". Poor Dee Dee. No matter how much she or we try to smooth it down, it sticks right back up again.

Dee Dee doesn't know she's somewhat of a celebrity. Dee Dee and her best friend Thomasina are featured on Rosehaven Cottage's exclusive "got mice?" line of people t-shirts, doggy and kitty t-shirts, BBQ aprons, hats, and (of course) mousepads. In fact, right now by computer mouse rests on a "got mice?" mousepad!

Click here to learn more about Dee Dee, the matriarch kitty of Rosehaven Cottage.

Poor Dee Dee... It's Hard Being the Matriarch Kitty

A recent post over at Greenie Gardens talked about their kitty cat, Sparky. I quote:

"He has no sense of propriety and lays on top of Goldie and knocks Sylvester off
his food."

I had to laugh because I thought only our kitty cat Gus Gus (aka Gussy Bear) did that! Ironically, Hubby had just captured Gus doing the former (i.e., laying on top of our orange tabby Dee Dee) in a photograph the day before I read the post at Greenie Gardens about Sparky.

Photo below: Gus Gus just flops right on top of Dee Dee if he can find her sleeping somewhere where there is room for him.

Photo below: Dee Dee oftens looks up with eyes that say, "Daddy, help me!!!!!"